I almost died?

My friend is a creepy stalker and she’s f**king scaring me right now.

hey, your mom doesn’t update her blog anymore?

no

wait what?

rin wtf r u a f**king stalker?

i am

That was the convo between me and Rin. And that was how now at 1am I’m going through my mom’s blog and is shedding a few tears.

I found out a lot of things about me and mom that either I don’t remember or I don’t know. The first thing that I found out in one of my mom’s blog post entry 3/7/2010 was that I had a 99% chance of dying during birth. Ok wtf.

I heard the story of my birth told by my mom a few times. Saying that I’m the ’cause’ of her not giving birth the normal way and had to go through caesar. (was that how you spell it? idk but she had to go through a operation so I could be born) Nonetheless she is still grateful that I was born safe and healthy. She said that my umbilical cord (tbh i dunno what it’s called in english) was wrapped around my neck. Well, that was one part of the story she told me. What she didn’t told me was that my umbilical cord was wrapped twice on my neck and if they didn’t proceed with the operation a minute earlier, I, would have not existed…

After finding out about this info, I have no idea how to take it in. Like a lot of things goes through my mind like what if the operation went a minute later, what would have happen to me? What would have happen to my mom, my family?  Ok wow me slow down you lil’ shithead be damn grateful you’re alive. Ugh damn I feel so troublesome.

My mom post a lot of my embarrassing sides wwww. Mentions of me modelling for her sewing crafts. Cards and letters I gave her during birthdays or apology letter I gave her when she was angry wwww. Looking back at these makes me remember my childhood. How my mom trying her best as a parent to raise me well and educated. How my dad work really hard for the family and only had a few weekends he could truly spend with our family. How the addition of my brother to my family somehow got us more happy.

I don’t know but all these stuff, looking back at my mom’s blog; how I love to play my mom’s Farmville on FB lol; the times I was lazy doing my homework; our old digital camera which we still have now and how cam quality sucks lol; the many moments of our family and my mom growing up that she posted in her blog. All of these cracks my heart and bring tears to my eyes. Now look at me,

I have my own blog like my mom, sharing my opinion; having what seems like the same thoughts my mom had when she was younger, when she was at my age.

Thanks, Rin for letting me go through my mom’s old blog and letting me feel a bit of what she had in mind. Thanks mom, dad for raising me up. Thanks bro, for being born even if sometimes you annoys me. Thanks Squad8 for being there for me, even if we have disbanded I know that deep down each one of us still want Squad8 again. Thanks Locka M8 without realizing I have named the group chat with little implications that I want Squad8 again lol. Thanks to my classmates back then or even now, for making every school year seems a tad bit fun to me even if we still hate school. Thanks teach, for every lessons you have taught. Thank God that I was and still am alive and breathing. Thanks late sis for looking after me in Heaven. Thanks everyone for everything.

This was KiiRA being emotional af wwwwwww. I should stahp. Anyway a fanfiction may come in soon. Dunno when but hopefully soon. Well then see ya!

^^;

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