A Sad Donut and A Flood of Emotions

Sugar powdered donut did nothing wrong.

Today is my birthday weeeee yay me!!! lmao

I stop caring about birthdays when I was 10. I mean I stopped caring about my own birthday because no one but my family ever remembers it. But I’m a good person (as I always boast) so I’ll wish others birthdays and let it slide when they forgot mine. Ha sad,

But today was my birthday and my high school friends of three years now wished me (although some of them might have forgotten lol). Their birthday wishes to me was so long and pretty much sum up my whole 15 years of life (bam! I just revealed my age).

I kinda expected no one would remember and I never really wanted my birthday to be extravagant or some sort. I didn’t run around and tell everyone in school it’s my birthday, casually having conversation with them like I always do. To be honest I hated when one of my deskmates found out it was my birthday and tell the whole class to sing happy birthday to me because I hate being the center of attention despite always seeking for it.

I feel like it’s better that people don’t know rather than they know because then you would know who’s sincere and who just followed the flow.

I never expected something special, I’m just glad and grateful for my life as it is now. There’s ups and downs and more often the struggles in life. I may not come from a wealthy family but we’re happy (or at least we try). My friends, they’re not the best role models but they’re there and I’m grateful. Grateful because after years of being alone and looking for comfort, I’ve found a home filled with these friends I call my sisters. I’m introverted, quiet and only talk when calls for it but when I look back and see all these familiar faces there for me, I’m contented.

They’re there for me despite the arguments we have and every time I look at them I say; wow, do I deserve them? But then they’re there telling me the same thing; do we deserve you? And I’m happy to know I’m needed in their life as much as they’re to me.

If it weren’t for them, god knows where I am right now.

And yeah, I’m 15 now. Weirdly enough I could see how much I’ve changed in 15 years. My parents say I mature too much, but that’s okay. At least, now that I’m 15, I’m happier than I was 5 years back, struggle, but happy. I’m grateful for everything even though some forgets me along the way but that’s a normal thing to me, I’m fine. I am no one’s number one but I’m glad that I cross their mind when down in a dump. Ha sad.

 

^^;

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